by Jill | Jul 20, 2020 | Child Counseling, Child Therapy, children, children self help, continuing education, counseling, divorce, family therapy, parenting, parents, Play Therapy, play therpay
What to Expect From Your Play Therapist if You’re Getting a Divorce
One of the most challenging issues a family can face is divorce. It affects everyone involved in some way. Children, parents, extended family, and others close to the situation. It can also be one of the most challenging and complex cases I can treat in play therapy. Emotions are high, changes are happening, and there are a lot of unknown factors. On a practical level, counseling for everyone involved is recommended.
So, if you, as a parent are going through a divorce, have been through a divorce, or planning on getting one, here are some ways to make your child gets the most benefit from play therapy and to assist your child in coping with the changes that are happening in your family and also what roles I can and cannot play as a child therapist.
Remember I’m there to treat your child, and am neutral when it comes to parental conflicts.
Understand that I will not be able to fix your marriage.
I cannot determine custody of your children.
Custody evaluation is a separate role from therapy, and there are mental health professionals, primarily psychologists, that specialize in this area.
Don’t involve me in your court issues.
It is paramount that I be able to maintain your child’s confidentiality and a neutral safe space for them to process their emotions. This is a traumatic time for them, and involving me in court will often require that I break that confidentiality and it always affect my therapeutic relationship with your child.
Give your child space for their own processing.
Your child will love both of you.
Both parents should participate in the therapy process in some way, taking turns to bring your child to therapy or coming together with them shows that you are supporting their journey through this process.
Participate in your own therapy.
This is a stressful and highly emotional time for everyone and I want you to take care of yourself as much as I want your child to get through this change as healthy as possible.
Keep children out of adult conflicts.
This includes parenting disagreements, knowledge about court proceedings over their developmental level, questioning your child about the other parent, or other situations where it puts your child in a no-win situation.
If your child is upset or emotional, listen, empathize and allow for open expression of feelings even if it is difficult for you.
Don’t blame, complain, or vent about your ex- or soon to be ex-spouse in front of your child.
Be honest with your child: tell them what they need to know, when a change is occurring
It is ok to say “I don’t know,” or “let me think about my answer” to questions children may have for which you yourself are uncertain.
Be prepared for children to have various emotions.
Maintain a predictable routine as much as possible
Maintain your parenting limits and boundaries.
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by Jill | Aug 12, 2019 | Becoming a Licensed Professional Counselor, Burnout prevention, Child Counseling, Child Therapy, continuing education, Coping with Burnout, counseling, Finding Peace, mental health business, Play Therapist Self Care, Play Therapy
“Accepting the presence of compassion fatigue in your life only serves to validate the fact that you are a deeply caring individual. Somewhere along your healing path, the truth will present itself: You don’t have to make a choice. It is possible to practice healthy, ongoing self-care while successfully continuing to care for others.”
Compassion Fatigue Awareness Project ©(2017)
Man, I had a tough week last week. Do you ever have one of those? Most of us do. Counseling can be a rewarding job, you have the privilege to see people through some of their most difficult points in life and the come out the other side better than they were before. But, sometimes you have just one of those weeks, or days or cases that gets to you for one reason or another.
Child therapy especially, in my opinion bring another level of emotional challenge. You see children through abuse, neglect, and often changes in their lives that they have no control over. They are dependant on the adults in their lives to be safe, and there are some fantastic parents out there, but home is not always a safe or stable place for children. Witnessing that day in day out can lead to disillusionment and frustration with environmental factors. It can be easy to lose home for a moment, and forget that there is hope out there, there are safe places, there are puppies and rainbows, there are caring people out there.
It’s natural and human for us as counselors to have emotions about our cases and to sometimes see others’ pain as our own. (See Dr. Sood’s Video on emotions and the brain here). We have the unique position of holding others’ pain while at the same time being responsible for managing the challenges, hurts and trials of our own lives. Sometimes we can experience compassion fatigue. When we do, we should be accepting of where we are. Is it worth the challenge? You tell me in the comments below.
For Mental Health Professionals Working Towards Becoming a Registered Play Therapist or a Licensed Professional Counselor
For Mental Health Professionals Looking for Continuing Eduaction Training
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by Jill | Jul 20, 2017 | afraid, Anxiety, Becoming a Licensed Professional Counselor, Child Counseling, Child Therapy, continuing education, Counseling Supervision, mental health business, Play Therapist Self Care, Play Therapy, Play Therapy Supervision, Uncategorized
I’ll never forget the first time I saw play therapy. When my late supervisor allowed me to observe my first play therapy session I fell in love at first sight. It felt right. It felt natural to me and I loved how it worked with where the child was in their development.
That session was a pivotal moment for me. It started a passion that motivated me to pursue my career and specialty as a play therapist and play therapist supervisor. I had so much to learn, but it didn’t stop me from moving towards my goals.
I had no idea what kind of challenges lay ahead, including difficult work environments, heavy caseloads, and the level of trauma and complex issues that my young clients face with courage.
I have non-therapist friends ask me “how do you work with …(place favorite issues here). What I tell people (and myself when I’m faced with challenges of my job) is that yes, but I get to see a child heal from a trauma, connect with their parent, make new friends, learn how to stop being afraid and live a full life. I get to watch people heal and increase their faith in their God and themselves. I get to spend my day alongside young ones who deal with so much they should be too young for.
At the end of the day it’s encouraging work. It’s worth it. Some cases are sad. True. I have to constantly balance my work life, and personal life, true. I have to keep my emotions in check sometimes and my support systems close. But at the end of the day, it’s worth it.
What’s your passion? What fuels you? Leave a Comment Below about how you found your passion.
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by Jill | Jun 20, 2011 | Child Therapy, continuing education, Denise Filley, Play therapy interventions, Play Therapy Techniques, sandtray therapy, Techniques, therapy, toys, Trauma Therapy, Workshops
I recently attended a wonderful 2-day sandtray workshop with Denise Filley at Marietta Counseling Center for Children and Adults in Marietta, GA. I have been using sandtray work with my clients since I began this journey of becoming a play therapist, this was the most comprehensive training on sandtray work that I have attended. We covered a range of topics including materials, history of sandtray therapy, and also different perspectives of using the sandtray.
This workshop was highly experiential, including practicing with a partner, group activities, and also individual sandtrays.My favorite part of the training was a partner activity where we did mutual story telling in the sandtray. I had the privilege of practicing that activity with a co-worker, and we took turns picking a figure and adding a story line. I found that after this weekend workshop, we created about 6-7 different types of sandtrays, and I stayed with the same partner throughout the training. At the end of the training we had a larger group tray with about 4-5 different members. We all took turns adding figures until we thought the tray was finished. I found it to be very process oriented, and by the end of the training felt more relaxed and had relieved some stress that I had been experiencing at the time, in addition to feeling like I build some positive relationships with other therapists.
The staff at Marietta Counseling showed professionalism and also hospitality by providing breakfast in the morning, snacks and beverages throughout the training, answering questions, encouraging networking, and also the time they spent setting up all of the sandtray figures!
After this training I felt prepared to go back to work and utilize the techniques we learned right away. I look forward to practicing and increasing my experience using sandtray therapy. I hope to attend future trainings led by Denise Filley, as well as held at Marietta Counseling Center for Children and Adults.
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